Scrapheap Diary, The Anoraks

Anoraks Scrapheap Diary

"Sand Racers"

Day One

The day started quite normally, got up had coffee thought "what shall I do today" then I remembered, and the panic started, "We're doing Scrapheap!" What if we're building wind powered coffee grinders, model aircraft, or worse global thermo-nuclear devices, what if the expert is a fool? What if we don't finish? With some trepidation I set off to the hotel.

Lyndon, Marc, Geoff & Expert Paul.

I met Marc and Lyndon at the hotel, well I say in the hotel, the hotel bar, we had made several rules about Scrapheap, no tank tracks, no electronics, no chains and no hydraulics, it was a bit late to suggest no beer, though I later wished I had.

Teams, experts, judge and some of the crew the night before.

After a few to steady our nerves we were collected by the lovely Naomi to take us to the heap to do our first bit of filming, get fitted for overalls and those natty hard hats. The heap is all very surreal, when you see it on telly you think it's all a load of junk and it's exactly that! The other thing you recognise all the old cars and boats that you've seen in the background for years, but now you can see them in context and they are very real!

Build Day

TV people it seems can't sleep, they have this thing about getting up at the crack of dawn to hang about and do nothing for hours at a time, I suppose someone was busy somewhere but doing what, I have no idea. The biggest problem with getting up early was the night before, all along the RDF people had said "get a early night and don't drink to much" we of course knew better!

Lyndon by the entrace to the build area.

In the bar we met the other team, the 3 Hoselliers, firemen from the North, we also met the two experts and the Judge, we all got on like the proverbial house on fire and took over most of the bar with ourselves and half the film crew, I have no idea what time we went to bed, or even how much we drank, but my bar bill was going to get me in trouble at home!

The Totem pole and start clock in the background.

After what seemed like an age, we were ready to start filming the intro, this involved running round the heap trying to look keen and ready to go, we had to shout a lot that we were ready to build anything, fortunately there were no close up shots of the 6 pairs of bloodshot eyes that blinked out from behind the hard hats of the two teams as Robert and Lisa fired up our enthusiasm

That done we stood in front of the podium while Lisa and Robert told us what we were going to build, up until now we had no idea as it had been kept very secret,

"Teams I want you to build a Sand Racer"

"Fantastic" we thought, "nice 4x4, big engine, easy we can do that with our eyes closed!"

"The big rule however is NO FOUR WHEEL DRIVE"

"OK" we though "no problem we could build a big engined rear wheel drive buggy, or a hovercraft, or something", we then run into our work area and there's Paul our expert,

"So what are we going to build then" I ask

"Sand Racer" Says Paul

"Beach Buggy? Hovercraft? Schlesser Buggy?"

"How about a 6 wheel drive buggy?"

"AAAAhhhhhhh !!!!"

Nice idea, one hell of a lot of work but nice idea, we then thought now how could we make a very difficult build even more of a challenge, I know lets not have a steering wheel!
Paul our expert converts 4x4's into 6x6's as his living, this I think was the main reason for his desire to go for the 6 wheel drive plan, fortunately for us Paul really knew what he was doing so we put our faith in his basic design. The design changed a lot over the course of the build, it became a real team effort as we all put our ideas in, however without Paul's knowledge and seriously hard work I very much doubt we would have got finished.
And so it came to pass the Anorak Racer was going to be a 6x6 with skid steer and of course built from scrap, what ever happened to the plan of a nice simple easy build.
Marc and Lyndon set off into the heap to find a vehicle while Paul and I tried to make a rough plan for what we were going to make, we would need to start with a 4x4 and add a axle, sounds easy if you say it fast enough.

The Patrol as we got it into the build area.

The vehicle we ended up with was on old Nissan Patrol, had a hell of a job getting off the heap as it was very well buried at one stage we pinched the other teams quad and had two quad bikes trying to drag it off. Getting it back it was only the start of all our problems. One of our first rules was to get the engine started, there was no way we could do that as the engine was sitting at a nasty angle due to the accident damage the Patrol had suffered, and why it was in the yard in the first place. The other more serious problem was both axles on the Patrol were shot. We had an engine, gearbox and chassis and that was it.

Soon after a Land Rover rear axle was found, quickly followed buy a home made trailer with yet another Land Rover axle, Paul and I set about making a bogey for the rear four wheel drive. We basically bolted the two outputs of the Patrol's transfer case to the diff's on the Land Rover Axles (after locking the steering on the front (what was to become the middle axle).

The rear 4 wheels and dive connected and ready to attach.

All we needed now was the third axle Marc and Lyndon had been gone for some time, there was a problem, there was not another Land Rover axle on the heap, well there was but it was above head height and therefore out of bounds, the only alternative was a Suzuki front axle, I knew from my history with Suzuki's that it would take the torque of the bigger engine (Straight 6, 2.8) but the diff ratios would be all out, the front wheels would probably turn a lot faster then the rear!

Rear wheels going on.

We decided not to worry about diff ratios. We still had to find more transfer cases, and make up the props to for the drive line, if we did get as far as worrying about the ratios all we needed to do was make bigger / smaller wheels on the Suzuki axle.
The transfer cases, we had three, the original Patrol one driving the rear four wheels, one from a farming machine of some sort to drive the Patrol transfer box, and to spur into the third transfer box, that looked like it came from a food processor. That would provide forward drive for the front axle.
Very complicated and several hundred possible points of failure, not what we had originally planned! A long hard days work but we were there, the "Six on Wheels" was a runner, well nearly, the engine ran on four cylinders, the only problem was it had six, we would need out fettlin' time to try and sort that.
The worst thing about the build was not the stop start of the filming, even the enormity of our build, it was the weather. The day started nicely, then it rained, the sun came out, it rained again, it rained harder, it rained softer, it drizzled, it hailed, it really hailed golf balls hammering out of the sky, at one stage we had nearly a inch of ice on the work bench! It didn't stop, Marc and Lyndon were getting very dejected, cold and wet on the heap and with the enormity of the build it was difficult to keep spirits up.

Ice on the workbench after the storm.

Marc and Duncan look at the days work.

I have no idea what time we made it back to the hotel, all of us totally exhausted, the Hoselliers being the forward thinking bunch they are had stashed a case of beer, all of us sat in the empty hotel reception enjoying a well deserved beer.

Some of the crew in the hotel reception

The next day we rested, and boy did we need it, this was to give the safety people time to check out vehicles and fit roll cage, harness and racing fuel tank (we were not allowed to)

Being interviewed by Lisa during Tinker Time

All set after Tinker Time

Test Day

another silly early start in TV land. The test was to be held in a sand quarry in darkest Hampshire, for the fettlin' time Marc and Lyndon worked on trying to find why the engine was only running on four, I had some green paint and started the decorating. The engine problem turned out to be the spark plug leads were in the wrong order, the firing order was correct, however the rotor arm was going anti-clockwise and we thought it should be clockwise, Marc and Lyndon had sussed it just as Duncan the expert from the Hoselliers suggested that must be the problem, no doubt Duncan will take the credit!

The First Test

The first test was to be a hill climb. Easy for us we had six wheel drive, difficult for the Hoselliers as they only had two wheel drive, sadly that was not to be the case. The hill was not too steep so the Hoselliers made it look easy, Marc who drew the short straw and was our driver, made a good start but ground to a halt after 10 metres. I don't think there was anyone there who didn't think that it was broken, our hearts sank as we walked down the hill to the stricken vehicle. Good news! It was not broken it was crossed out on its axles, as we had skid steer we didn't have any suspension, with no suspension it was easy for one wheel to be up in the air on one side and another wheel to be in the air on the other. As the diff's put the power down to the wheel of least resistance and they were spinning uselessly in the air we stopped.

Marc on the start line of the first test.

The Second Test

The Second test was the speed event, we had no chance, the driveline would break and our steering system was more suited to straight lines rather then high-speed corners! We took most of the air out of the tyres, to give us some rudimentary suspension and Marc was told to go for poo or bust, and he did! The Hoselliers did the test in 48 seconds (my unofficial timing) Marc surprised us all by taking off like bat out of hell and put in a stunning performance to complete the course in 45 seconds, everyone, the whole cast and crew clapped it was a stunning drive!

Marc on the Speed run, test two.

The ThirdTest

The third test was the killer, the longest and most demanding, tight bends, soft sand, yumps, big drops and an optional steep climb at the end to make up some time. The Hoselliers went first, Sifter at the wheel, as he was sitting on the start line we noticed that the front wheels were slightly pointing in different directions. This proved to be a problem, at the first corner, a right hand hairpin, he failed to get round, in fact he drove off the course and had to reverse back on, he got as far as the yumps, hit the first one at speed and stopped. The marshals freed him (he incurred a 30 second penalty) he got to the second yump and with no momentum beached himself, again he had to be rescued (another 30 seconds), he finished the course at quite a reduced speed, when he got nearer we saw why, one of the castings on the front suspension had collapsed so he only had one wheel steering

Marc Givin' It Some, test three.

So the Anoraks were in with a chance, we had got back the minutes penalty we incurred on the hill climb so were only a few seconds behind, Marc looked like he was nervous, in fact I think it's safe to say he was bricking it! He took of at quite a speed, we were now much more confident that the drive line was strong enough and even if it did brake now it didn't matter. We held our breath when he got to the yumps, he hit them with exactly the right speed and made it over all three with out too much difficulty. The left hand hairpin was nearly his undoing, he came within an inch of dropping off the side, however he made it and kept up his speed and finished the test without too much difficulty

We Won !!

The officials then had to get their calculators out, quite a nervous time for us as though we had done well we had quite a lot of time penalties to make up, in the end we won by 45 seconds!!

The prize? More sleepless nights & stupidly early starts!

Next Challenge "Power Rowers"